Random

~I'm sorta blah. Not depressed or 'down', just kind of generally uninterested. I think this is the 'post' part of PTSD.

My dreams have been pleasant and eventful, so sleeping has been especially nice. Can't sleep all the time of course. But right now I'm happier when I am.

I know I need to process this betrayal some more, but I don't have the heart for it just yet....

Stress Flow

~It seems my stress starts at the top and works its way down. First my neck and shoulders tighten up. Then when the stressor itself has passed, and they loosen up, my guts go all to hell. Finally it shoots out my ass in a hot stream of liquid shit.

I'm in the middle phase right now...

Random

~Another 'long nap', quarter of nine last night until half five this morning. Vivid dreams about working on The Explanation, which I take as a Good Sign.

Was just telling Le-Le about that out on the porch. She said, “The blocks are removed.” She's just woken up, too. Down to fifteen hours. Healing Sleep.

As with yesterday, my head is okay, but thinking about this Betrayal still makes my stomach hurt. So I'll think about other things for now...

Random

~Lay down around 8am for a 'wee nap'. Woke up around 3pm. Guess I was more tired than I thought.

And yes, all this has been fucking tiring. My head's okay, but it's taken a toll on my guts. The last two breakfasts have been uncomfortable. Even yogurt got a rumbly reception. *urp*

But I've been told Tyger is now 'out of the jurisdiction', back down to LA, where it seems there is an arrest warrant waiting for her on an entirely separate charge, one that we only just found out about. I suspect someone's gonna lock her up for something before the year is out.

Now I think I'll go put our gimp plates [Disabled Person] on the trucklette. They took forfuckingever to get here, but they did save us a hundred bucks on registration this year.

On The Menu For Today

~Sleep, schadenfreude and a cheeseburger.

Victim as Victimizer

~Wherein the ABUSE and/or SUFFERING a person has undergone is considered by them to be so HEINOUS that this then justifies any and all behavior on their part, no matter how said behavior may hurt others, because THEIR DAMAGE has now become more important than anything or anyone else, at all times and forever.

Random

~Oy....

I was up from 3:30am to 7pm yesterday, which is a long day for me, especially as Le-Le woke me up at that time to share this extension of the on-going clusterfuck with me. At the Sheriff's by 7am and then working the phone on and off until mid- afternoon.

A 'retaliatory visit' from Animal Control was also on the menu. [at least Le-Le was asleep for that] I explained what was going on [the AC officer knew the Deputy dealing with this..small town, ya know] and I showed her Flopsie, who is all sleek and plump, and she was like “Oh yes, they're fine” in a few seconds. We talked cats for a few minutes [she was a young 'cat lady' lol] and that was that.

Then talked with Kat for a couple of hours, which chilled me. [thanks, babe xoxox] I had talked with Ana Q yesterday, which also chilled me. [thanks to you too, doll xoxox] Overall both interfaces helped a lot. The Sisterhood, though still effectively unformed, is out there and essentially waiting for me to finish my Major Majickal Working aka The Explanation.

Anyway, I'm up for a while and will likely crap out again before dawn. Fuckin' fried.

And there ya have it...