Friday, November 4, 2011

Notes On Editing “The Introduction”

~The thing had seemed a bit anemic to me for a while [original version here] but I choose to just ‘forge ahead’ and deal with it later. I was so good at it that I really dropped the file altogether…until I changed the overall title.

Then ‘something had to be done’. That something was adding The Temple’s Mission Statement and even doing a wee edit upon that as well. It’s still part of Part Three: “The Temple’s Grand Strategy” and that will need a bit of editing too, but I’m already busy rummaging around in that anyway.

Because I changed the title to The Message of The Fifth Wave: Her Prophet Explains The Temple Of The Pentavalence I needed to add The Mission Statement because that explains the whole Fifth Wave issue from its source.

And then I saw two things in that I felt compelled to edit. The first was just to add ‘Second’ to the opening line: “The Temple is a Fifth Wave Feminism in that it leaps ahead of a nascent Fourth Wave, still incrementally emerging from the Second and Third Waves, to an entirely new construct.” I believe such to be a more accurate statement in that the Second and Third Waves are both still ‘roiling’.

But it is this sentence added at the end of the second paragraph that I believe the most significant: ”This is a Goddess driven Transhumanist Feminism.” Seven words – Marketing’s Golden Rule of Sound Bites – that truly sum up our entire Purpose, Strategy and Methodology.

In some ways I’m more pleased of these few words than with the thousands I cranked out in the past few days. Any halfway literate schmuck can blather on endlessly about complex subjects, but to come up with such a tight marketing phrase takes not only genius, but Luck.

Say it with me: ”This is a Goddess driven Transhumanist Feminism.”

It’s fucking catchy, ain’t it. *grin*

New Version

No comments: